Weekly Weight In Results and a few victories!

Great News...Im down 1.6 for a total of 15 lbs!   I was just sitting here thinking that I think I really can do this!  If Im honest with myself,  it really hasn't been that difficult.  I sometimes feel like its taken forever to hit my mini goal, but it really hasn't, just about 9 or 10 weeks.   More important than the number on the scale is that my outlook is different.  I've started working out again, I COOK!!!! shocking I know.  What it comes down to is that this is something I feel I can do the rest of my life.

The one thing I struggle with is that pesky little voice in me that has been a constant companion over the last 36 years.  You know the voice, the one that beats you up if you eat something you know you shouldn't, the one that when you are out to dinner with friends is trying to calculate the calories in the meal and judging if your friends are still eating I guess its okay for me too, the one that beats me up for the next week on how I should have ordered something better and healthier for me.   Basically, I feel like Im always trying to fend off "the voice".

 Last night I had dinner at a friends.   This friend just happens to make the best lasagna I have EVER had.  I decided that this was a treat that I was going to allow myself and not feel bad about it.  This is something I don't have very often and Im going to enjoy, but not binge on, then move on.   Well it worked.    I put my salad and breadstick on my plate and then faced down the lasagna.  The serving size was huge...seriously I'm talking 6 x 6 " squares.  So I cut it in half and then enjoyed.  I didn't sit there and focus on how everyone else was eating the whole 6x6 square and how that remaining 3x3 piece I left behind was calling out to me for seconds.  I simply enjoyed and then let it go.   

Now this victory is a big one for me but I have an even bigger one.   We had these amazing specialty cupcakes for dessert.  I picked the Flourless Chocolate cupcake and Im always amazed at how fudgy and chocolaty they get these.  In the past I've eaten the whole thing, even though it  is so rich and decadent I was always satisfied with just eating half, but since is was there and so good I would just polish it off.  Well, last night I encouraged others to taste it which left me with about half the cupcake left.  I savored and enjoyed the 2 or 3 bites and actually threw away the rest.   I didn't hear the cupcake screaming for me to come back and eat it. I didn't dwell on it the rest of the night and better than that....the voice isn't beating me up this morning!